check this out

OKAY, so today I had my first STAT 125 quiz. I think I did really well, maybe even a little over prepared, but nothing wrong with that. I got home and after I ate I really wanted to do something. SOMETHING! It didn't have to be exciting or magnificent, just something. So, I thought for a little bit and what came to mind? Of course, MOVIES, the biggest and easiest past time it seems lately for me. That's okay though, I was racking my brain for good movies I could go rent. I'm thinking, "what the heck is good, I have seen so many, this shouldn't even be hard." Well, I remembered a movie that I recommended to Jocelyn (friend from Michigan) and it stuck in my head. Donnie Darko was the movie that came first to mind. It is such an amazingly created film. It is truly freaky though and really can make you think. I HIGHLY RECCOMEND it to anyone who calls themselves a "movie buff." It has turned into a cult classic, and it's just crazy. If you want a little insight into how crazy the movie really is, well I found this web-site Now, to really be able to enjoy what this deep and well made web-site has to offer, it is best to watch the actual movie and find things out on your own. BUT, if you are a cheater, you can use THIS CHEAT PAGE, and still have the same results, although not as fulfilling. SO, I really got off on a tanget there, but I was trying to give a little tiny background before I share this CREEPY EXPERIENCE!

I called up my friend Tony, and Chris just happened to be over there (very typical night for them) and I call him up and say, "have you ever seen Donnie Darko Tony?" He told me no, and said he would like to watch it. I go over there and me, Chris & Tony watch this film. I have seen Donnie Darko many, many times and it never gets old. I guess it is just one of those films. Anyways, the movie gets over, and we are talking about it a bit. I go to leave, and Tony says, "hey, are you gonna take the DVD with you?" I always forget stuff like that, so I go to pick it up off the coffee table, and find a picture....... BLEW MY MIND! Before I even let Chris look at it, I asked tony when he drew it. He told me that he was just doodling a couple of days ago, and left it out on the table. Look what I created with the picture he drew, and the DVD cover.

Don't forget that Tony has never seen this movie before, and just drew this picture one day as a sketch. :-O Donnie Darko is about time travel, and all the crazy things interrelated with it. The sketch looks disturbingly similar to the dillusion that Donnie (main character) has through out the film of a creepy bunny suite face. Even the teeth on the sketch are just like the ones on the bunny mask! It was just a good ending to a crazy movie.....but was that all it was?????? ;-)

cool pool

I think I would really love to swim in that pool. I think it would be quite fantastic. FANTASTIC!

So I got a chance to lead a Bible study on my own today with some of the cabin guys from camp. I almost called it off because several people cancelled and I didn’t even know and I almost listened to the voice that told me to just do it next week. BUT, I ended up Punching that voice in the face.

It was just me and two other guys, but it was so perfect and I had fun with them. I love the kids I get to spend time with, because it is more than "kids I spend time with." They become my friends, and I am getting stronger in that fact/idea. So cool how God twists things up on me. Love that guy! Also, it's funny that I put a picture of a pool to start this BLOG out, because after the bible study (which was on Philemon & forgiveness) we hopped in one of the guys Grandparents pool. We swam and had fun and it was very good. Then I went to STAT class and it was also good, I feel like I am prepared for the Quiz tomorrow. :-) WE'LL SEE.

______________________________

Also, I had a talk with someone I love and respect very much. This person is someone who has been so good to me even when I was not good to this person. This person always had my back, even when it was turned away from this person. This person was really hurting and needed to talk tonight, so we talked. I feel stronger in the idea of unconditional LOVE. I spoke to this person as though someone else was speaking through me. This is what I came up with, maybe with a little help from the ideas presented in those letters and writings in the one book, ummm, ohh yea, the Bible.

Unconditional love is given to us by God. It comes along with the gift of Grace (undeserved love and favor). They are pretty much one in the same. How are we suppose to return that to humans on this sinful and hurting earth? Well, I believe that we have to show gentiles what it means to have a personal and meaningful relationship with Christ without ever judging or looking down on them, not ever once for a second. We won’t be able to do that, but I think that as long as we constantly seek His face and desire a loving heart, he will give it. So to put plan into practice, here is a question.

How do you love someone who has hurt more times than you can count? How do you love that person at the same level, when you aren’t loved in return?

Christ commands us to love men, just as he loves us. To be quick to forgive, to always look upon people with compassionate eyes and to speak to them with tender tongues. If we don’t like a specific attribute about them, or we think that there is something sinful in their life that needs to be changed…..too bad! If they aren’t in a personal relationship with Christ, they aren’t held to the same standards as those of us who are, and we can’t force it. We have no right to judge. Just because someone changes their actions, doesn’t mean their heart is changed. We can’t make them feel excluded either, you have to find that balance, and pray that you are kept in check. Their feelings must be handled with care, and we (Christ followers) must never allow them to be turned away from His love because of our actions. WOW, that is a lot to take in! That isn’t something simple to do. Here is another question.

How can we (Christ followers) honestly start to change the way we view and feel about sinful attributes of the gentiles that we care so much about and love?

Well, I don’t think that WE can do it. Christ can remove that hardness in our hearts though. IF we want him, and desire that he does so. I really like being enlightened in Christ. It makes me feel special. SMILES

Mer can join the>

Today I worked on some homework, tomorrow I will wake up early and work on some more. I LOVE ME SOME STATISTICS! :-/ Tomorrow I will be leading the group of guys that I was in a cabin with when I went with the Fort Wayne, Young Life kids to Timber Wolf Lake in Michigan. I am excited because the other leader is out of town for a month. He is actually acting as a head leader at TWL. I know just exactly what I am going to talk about too. I am pretty excited to do it. It is really pushing me into a leadership role.

Class went good today for the most part. THEN....

Well, let me start off by explaining a phone that my dad got earlier today. Around 3PM I was working on some STAT homework, and my dad was playing his computer game that he plays more than anyone I know. It never gets old to him......I am getting a little off, sorry about that. So the telephone rings, my dad goes to pick it up and I listen to the conversation. I hear him say, "you're kidding me, wow it has been so long, I am so glad you called" in a very excited tone. I continue to listen and I am getting very curious. Then I hear him talk about my sister Merideth, and I start to connect some of the dots. Phone conversation ends, and I am staring right at him. He had a big smile on his face when he looked at me. I said, "who the heck was it?" He told me that it was Merideth's half sister Jill calling from MA trying to get a hold of her. WOW!! This is HUGE! Merideth and I were both adopted at birth. In 2004 I had the chance to meet my biological family and answerer a lot of the questions I had been building up all the years of wondering. It is pretty typical of many adopted children. Merideth, however, could not do this. Her father died before she was even born, and her mother committed suicide when she was probably just a toddler. But today, out of no where, her half sister called to try to get in contact with her. SO SWEET!!

After my class got over @ 7:15PM, I went over to Mer's apartment and delivered some gifts I got when I was in Arizona, and then I got to deliver the good news. Boy her face lit up, and I could almost see some tension come off of her. I KNOW THAT FEELING!!! It is wonderful, and for her to just be able to feel strong in the fact that someone was searching her out, that makes a person feel like a million bucks. I really love Merideth so much, I hope this is nothing but the best for her, and that she can grow and learn everything she wants to learn.

back @ pathway

I worked at Pathway today. It was really cool because I can work there till I start at YMCA. That is awesome, Thanks God. ;-)I threw a lot of fertilizer today though. I did it really quickly, and I think I did a really good job. SO, of course I took a picture of me and the spreader....

I also started my summer class today. Statistics is the name of the game. I hate math by the way. I don't hate many things either, but I honestly do hate math. It is so difficult for me. STUPID M/S!

I have been talking with this girl, her name is Jocelyn. She was a summer staffer at Timber Wolf Lake when I went up there in Michigan with the local Young Life kids. She is really cool, I like talking with her a lot. Lives in Michigan though....... (sigh) figures. ;-)

G'Night!

SunDAY

Yes, it sure was nice to finally be back for S day. I have really missed my church (Pathway), although I do view "church" differently. I think there is this really messed up view of what church is suppose to look like. I don't think church has to be that 1-2 hour time frame you spend with a group of individuals singing, then listening to a message. I don't think that is what it was intended to be like.

Also, DAVE church, the church I was attending on Saturday evenings is now held on Sunday evening at 5:00, it was really good to be around Dave & Richard and Margie. Dave's daughter Rachel gave a very awesome depiction of how God is working in her life. She just got back from a church event called CDYC (Central district Youth Conference), which I have gone to several times when I was in high school. It is awesome to see how God is working in her life, and to see how sold out she is. Such a refreshing thing to see. I sure do see a lot of wisdom in that 16 year old head of hers.Also went to Collateral to end the evening. My ex girl friend Lauren was there with her cousin Brittney, and it was nice. That is Lauren in the above picture in the black. It was really nice to chat with her and her cousin, to be personable and that is just good. I have nothing but smiles about tension free relationships, especially ex g/f relationships. They should all be like that....ha...

G'Night!

this is what I say

Today, once I got up I borrowed the work truck from Pathway, and then I got my friend George. We man handled the old couch from the up stairs (my) living room, dumped it, and went and picked up the new one. Now I have this beautiful, comfy, big blue couch. I was telling my dad earlier, I may not have a good group of like minded friends to hang around, but I do have a nice couch. ;-)It was quite a challenge for us to get that huge couch through the small door way, but it was much harder getting the old couch out of the house. It was the kind of couch with a bet inside of it, and it was HEAVY! We managed it though, and now I really do have this huge blue comfortable thing to chill on. It is going to be good to go to church tomorrow, it has been such a long time since I have been there.

I just found the song "I'm not who I was" by Brandon Heath, man that is a simple but awesome song. I found it in my Windows Media Player library, never even knew I had it. Great song, I feel like it is very applicable to me too.

It would be so easy to go back to the way things use to be, but I would hate it so much. I may have to fight for this new way of life, but it is so worth it.

I also went to go work out at the YMCA today, and it was quite awkward, like there was a bunch of the big HUGE body building types there. They were all lifting like 3,oo0 lbs. But, it's all good, I think I am going to keep going back. I wanna learn how to play racquetball too. If I could only find a lifting buddy, that would be so good for me.

G'Night!

minimal Christian friends my age

I met up in Marion today to see my friend Matt Kern. It is a story of forgiveness, and it's really cool how that all worked out.We met up at a Mexican restaurant and talked for quite some time. I invited him to come up for the 4th of July.My brother in law to be forgot his hat and shades at my house, I wore them when I went to get TB tested for at the clinic for the YMCA job. ~PIMPIN!~Eventually I went to my friend Tony & Josh's house, and hung out for a while. He let me drive his 300 GT VR4, this thing is a twin turbo, and fast as heck. I had that thing going 85 like it was nothing.

I went home early because there was drinking & ick, and I just couldn't be around it. I wanna go back to Arizona where everyone thought and acted like me. I HATE THE REAL WORLD!! I don't really hate it, but wish I had a core group of Christians that I really liked and hung out with. I shall like prayer for that.

G'NIGHT!